Can I get a "Ramen!" brothers and sisters?

(Oh, and pretty-please do me the huge favor of laughing directly and conspicuously in the face of the next free market apologist who utters the word "accountablility." Obliged, as always.)

As if we needed further proof...

...that the party of Lincoln has become the party of Douglas.

Exhibit A: Mitt Romney. (with all due apologies to Monty Python)

Point One: You pathetically passe, flip-flopping, pandering git.

Point Two: When your peeps--the party of Moola Uber Alles--can't understand the economics of contraception, how do you expect to have the brains to figure out how to pay for all the unwanted zygotes that will flood the social system? Better yet--why don't you volunteer to adopt them ALL? Squelching contraceptive funding has consequences. And you should bear them (and personally, dammit!) more than anyone when you presume to make life-decisions for those far more vulnerable than you, who will never, EVER have to worry about making the rent.

Point Three: You pathetically passe, flip-flopping, pandering git.

Point : Contrary to your puerile Presidential power-fantasies (not unlike Spaceballs' Lord Dark Helmet's action figure role-playing), EX-GOVERNOR, EX-CANDIDATE, EX-RELEVANT Mister Romney, Gitmo's policies are not, in fact, the handiwork of the Executive Branch. You might have glossed over it in your law classes, but there are actually three branches of Government. That's what separates us--albeit barely in this day and age--from dictatorship. In case you didn't notice it during your round of glad-handing, not everyone agrees that the Bush Junta exercised the best judgment in what, exactly constituted "the worst of the worst." And by "best judgment" I also mean not making $#!+ up out of pure childish spite at not getting your way.

Point Five: You pathetically passe, flip-flopping, pandering git.

Point Six: There is NOOOOO!!! Point six.

Point Seven: You pathetically passe, flip-flopping, pandering git.

. . .

Actually, I could go on (and on) about the Mitster's predictions for the "fallout" from the stimulus package, but I think that the hypocrisy is pretty self-evident. Do a simple Google search for "Romney" and "bailout" or "Romney" and "TARP" and all but the Limbaugh-sucking Kool-Aid-snorters will see quite clearly that government spending is only socialist and irresponsible and dangerous when it's not handed to suits who make a [cough] "living" [cough] shoving numbers around on spreadsheets when they're not schmoozing with other, more alpha-suits.

(Not that I'm a fan of much of huge spending, mind you; it's the mind-boggling, sociopathic country club tribalism of the hypocrisy that galls me more than anything. I want to see these fat bastard kleptocrats and their enablers ostracized, pauperized and just plain ground into the filth as only hopeless poverty can grind a spirit.)

But, back in the Reality-based Community, Mittens has to get over himself: Right now he's basically Sarah Palin minus the nylons and pumps. Even the grandstanding Guiliani has more dignity, and he's actually donned nylons and pumps. Not exactly the high ground there, hey, Mitt?

On the bright side, though, I hope that Romney and Limbaugh and O'Reilly and Coulter and Hannity and the whole auto-fellating lot of them keep screeching. Loudly. Ringing in the ears of those who actually work for a living...or would be working if the bankrollers of these louts hadn't swept every last crumb out when they raided America's cookie-jar. America's historic memory once in a great while runs long. Remember 2004? Laissez-faire capitalism and "moral values" don't exactly pay the bills in 2009, now do they? Neither does immigrant-bashing, gay-baiting, stem-cell-coddling or politicizing-everything-that-isn't-red-hot. Bottom line: Even faith-based initiatives are grounded in cold, hard cash. And so I hope that the silver lining of the recession of 2009 and 2010 is that it brands into our race-memory the lesson that obsessing over bedroom shenanigans to the complete exclusion of boardroom criminality has very dire consequences for a society.

As much as I want to see a vibrant multi-party system, I'm still hoping that the GOP still doesn't get it. Understand that don't mean to detract in the least from Michael Steele's resounding achievement being elected as the head of the RNC today. (Take THAT, Strom Thurmond, you hypocritical child-molester) But my gut says that anyone--and I do mean anyone--elected to that post is like the Prime Minister of a coalition government, and doomed accordingly. The racist underpinnings of the GOP (David Duke, anyone?) have become too emboldened by the troglodytes-in-charge for the last fifteen years and more. Steele will be thrown under the bus--assuming that he isn't blatantly ordered to sit at the back of it--and replaced by someone of sufficiently Neanderthal political leanings. Or the party will split after another drubbing in the polls.

Either way, good riddance to them and their @#$%^&-up priorities.

Knocking it out of the park

For reasons I can never quite put my finger on, I'm normally more of a grudging admirer of Arianna Huffington. But her The Era of Not Getting It: The Marie Antoinettes of the Meltdown is an exception. Laser-precision and not sparing either political party...and well worth a few minutes of your reading time, IMO.

Uh-oh, Part II

I'm a programmer by trade, so I can't claim to be unbiased when it comes to offshoring. Partly, it's the insult of the double-speak that brasses me off. To wit: I can't get full concentration when I need it because The Powers That Be insist that being stuffed into an eight-cube "pod" makes me more "collaborative." Yet the same suits have no problem putting half the friggin' planet between those who dictate the specifications for software and those who implement them. (To contemplate such contradictions does not lead to Zen-like enlightenment; rather, it is the short road to madness.)

But quite apart from the headline-hogging aspects of offshoring our manufacturing base or our brain trust (and with it any motivation for new generations to opt for useful trades), there is the the question of whether or not America's corporate kleptocrats are digging our graves in more than a purely economic sense.

As if the profits made by Big Pharma weren't obscene enough, let's talk about the "side effects" of offshoring drug manufacturing to squeeze a few more drops of cream from that cash cow:

1. First, there's the strategic aspect. If medicines, particularly vaccines, are primarily manufactured in China, the question of availability (particularly in times of pandemic) are second only to those of quality, given the litany of tainted and/or deadly products in the headlines. In the event of pandemic, the Chinese government will--quite understandably--attempt to take care of its own. Except for those who can be bribed to turn a blind eye to the black market. Which, naturally, will be positively rife with tainted, counterfeit or under-dosed stock.
   
2. Now let's throw into the mix the abysmal environmental track record of these nations, this time turning to India's slice of pharmaceutical manufacturing. The take-away: "Those Indian factories produce drugs for much of the world, including many Americans. The result: Some of India's poor are unwittingly consuming an array of chemicals that may be harmful, and could lead to the proliferation of drug-resistant bacteria." [emphasis mine] Yes, I realize that bacteria and viruses are different things, but viruses mutate too, and randomly messing with peoples' immune systems most certainly doesn't help matters.
   
3. Finally, let's connect the last dots by considering the geography of avian influenza. The Spanish Flu pandemic spread world-wide in the considerably slower-paced WWI era. We, on the other hand, live in a world where an iPod is engraved in China Tuesday afternoon and on my desk Thursday morning.
   

Anyone else hear a ticking sound?

*This* is what I voted for, peeps

Copied directly from Daily Kos (with mad props):

On the 36th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, we are reminded that this decision not only protects women’s health and reproductive freedom, but stands for a broader principle: that government should not intrude on our most private family matters. I remain committed to protecting a woman’s right to choose.

While this is a sensitive and often divisive issue, no matter what our views, we are united in our determination to prevent unintended pregnancies, reduce the need for abortion, and support women and families in the choices they make. To accomplish these goals, we must work to find common ground to expand access to affordable contraception, accurate health information, and preventative services.

On this anniversary, we must also recommit ourselves more broadly to ensuring that our daughters have the same rights and opportunities as our sons: the chance to attain a world-class education; to have fulfilling careers in any industry; to be treated fairly and paid equally for their work; and to have no limits on their dreams. That is what I want for women everywhere.

Ramen, brothers and sisters. Ramen.

Why am I reading about this in "The Daily Beast"?

Just makes you fantasize about putting the the "lynch" in "Merrill Lynch" doesn't it? John Thain's $87,000 rug. Fantasize. With a little extra flourish of blisters on manicured hands--bleeding from the work of digging their own grave.

Mind you, "fantasize" is the operative word. If this day sees the order that ends some measure of the petty, indiscriminate vindictiveness embodied in Guantanamo Bay, surely I can lend my small echo to the return of rule of law.

But my fantasies are my own.

So my question for the Fourth Estate is: Why aren't headlines screaming variations of this story Every Mother-Loving Day until every last corner-suite kleptocratic wanker is exposed, investigated, and brought to court in class-action lawsuit(s) and/or criminal trial? It can't be lack of material, that's for d--n sure.

Update, 01.23.2008: I heard the $1.2 office upgrade discussed on the other side of the cubicle wall, so the word is getting out. These are pretty down-to-earth guys, too. Do I perchance feel the first tremors of the coming revolution???

Hahahahahahahahahaha

H/t to Daily Kos for linking to: DC's High-level Social Scene Now Mingles Black and White.

Cue Lily von Shtupp: "Is it twue how zey say zat you people are...gifted?"

giggle

giggle

...

SNORRRRRT!!!

Seriously, though, my Inner History Nerd can't help but wonder whether the salons of 19th century Washington DC were cultivating dudes in coonskin caps following the elections of Andrew Jackson and Abraham Lincoln. Wouldn't surprise me.

In a way, I'm even kinda hoping that at least one of the First Daughters morphs into something sassy enough to give Princess Alice a run for her money.

A good working definition of irony

(Coincidentally, I just received Margaret Atwood's "The Handmaid's Tale" back from the co-worker who'd borrowed it. She hated it, but she's glad she read it, if that makes any sense...)

Anyhoo...does anyone else find it in the least ironic that those who would ban the book from a Canadian high school would be the ones most likely to salivate over the prospect of living in the Republic of Gilead?

Memo: Homeschool if you can't bear the thought of exposing little Johnny to the real world. But for love of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, don't be surprised when neither he nor your grandkids ever visit you in the nursing home. (Grandkids, of course, being predicated on you arranging his marriage for him.)

Now, I realize that a democracy (and a civilized society in general) hinges upon multiple points of view. But the sense of entitlement of these parochial, super-sized toddlers masquerading as parents or upright citizens really (and I do mean really) stretches the limits of my polite tolerance.

Gaaagh. I just wish to Grethor that the U.N. could section off some corner of the planet where these sissypants ninnyhammers could live in their little bubble, hermetically sealed off from any possibility of contamination by capital-R Reality, much less the awe-inducing burden of critical thought. There, @$holes: Have your evolution denial and your global warming denial and your abstinence-only fairy-tales and your big hair and your Hummers and your Wal-Marts and your 57 channels of insipid "family" programming and your slave-manufactured plastic-craptastic "Wait 'til the Joneses see this" gewgaws by the cargo container.

Great. Now just stay the @#$% out of my Universe, you @#$%ing @#$%wits.

Almost wish, anyway. As much good as it would do the rest of the world to be rid of the Talibangelist mentality (no matter the religion), I can't in good conscience wish that on the children they would bring into their bubble. And they'd have 'em by the boatload--make no mistake about that.

But as it never will happen--the Religious Wrong's lion-chow persecution fantasies to the contrary--I can enjoy a bit of wishful thinking...

Drowning in vinegar and water

A Pundit Kitchen caption from a couple day ago: "There's a fine line between being a badass and a douchebag. You just crossed it." I think that we can safely say that Israel is unequivocally Douchebag Central right now:

"It's a total disaster for us," Ging said, adding that the U.N. had warned the Israeli military that the compound was in peril from shelling that had begun overnight. U.N. officials say they have provided Israel with GPS coordinates of all U.N. installations in Gaza to prevent such attacks. [emphasis mine]

So let me get this straight: The nearly-departed Bush Regime unilaterally invaded Iraq because a bottled-up Saddam Hussein was thumbing his nose at the UN. Yet we not only condone, but coddle a belligerent Israel, which has has been defying the same UN with its delusions of Manifest Destiny for over four decades? We blow the living snot out of nations to "bring democracy" to them, while Israel jerry-rigs its political process to disenfranchise the people it can't bomb. [snark]What, it doesn't make sense?[/snark]. Well, apparently it does to people who should know better.

Feh. So far as I'm concerned, barring children and those now politically powerless, any evil that befalls Israel now is the crop of its own planting. More tragically, we have the dirt of their fields under our fingernails here in America: The Democratic party is so knee-jerk about defending anyone perceived as a "minority," while the Republican party is run by people who cheer-lead butchery as the short road to The Rapture.

A perfect storm, in other words.

Lunchbox heroines

I had planned a snarky "In other news, water is still wet" kind of post. But it was trumped by a far more important theme. Namely the near-heartbreaking tenacity of the human spirit. Most especially in these young women.

(P.S. to the Taliban: Suck it, bitches.)

Geeky shout-out

Yes, I realize that SVG is going by the wayside in favor of (twitch, twitch) Flash, but these folks saved my bacon this morning, and I think that they deserve a hat-tip: https://www.ecrion.com/Support/Resources/XFRenderingServerHelp/index.html?pie_chart.htm

Tell me they didn't receive grant money for this...

Personally, I was a little incensed that somebody's deliberately coking up honeybees, particularly when the "research" basically confirms what's already known about behavioral reactions to the drug. How it's supposed to dislodge the spoon from a socialite's nose or the needle from a crack-addict's veins I fail to understand, unless a blocker drug is concocted. For cocaine anyway. But then there's the whole smorgasbord of (ahem) pharmaceutical--contraband or not--alternatives. Not to mention that blocker drugs do bupkis for the whole context of addiction. Feh. I guess what bothers me is that this seems like another silver bullet "solution" that may just end up contributing to the problem in the long run.

Or maybe I'm just cynical.

Part 1603 of "You know you're a costume geek when..."

...your go-to catalog is discontinuing its corset-making supplies and you're figuring out how many yards of stuff you can rationalize at 15% off.